Sunday, September 15, 2013

Giving up negative thoughts

Today I worked on Step 10! I halfway through my Study & Understanding section! Woot!

One of the answer sections asked that I give up negative thoughts for 24 hours.
So I'm doing it. Yep.
Next 24 hours.

Now I don't know if this means negative thoughts about myself or negative thoughts in general.
I am going to work on negative thoughts in general.
I want to be more positive. I want to have more gratitude.
I do not want to be down on myself. I don't want to judge others.

Well, this list is getting long, so let's just focus on negative thoughts. :)

This weekend for Relief Society, we wrote notes to the sisters in our ward. The notes were of
qualities we admired about that person.
I had fun writing mine.
Then I read the ones that were written to me.
Wow. I mean, I knew most of them would be about my smile and my laugh (that's what I usually get complimented on, not that I'm complaining).
Yet there were some that were on qualities I wasn't expecting. Or didn't realize others noticed. Or didn't think were important.
I felt loved.
That is what came to my mind when I read about giving up negative thoughts.
Seeing myself as other people see me.
Seeing life through eyes of gratitude.

Yesterday was hard. A huge feeling of sadness hit me in the afternoon.
Feeling lonely, sad, homesick for the UK, and feeling stuck.
I could have stayed on Facebook and looked at pictures of Scotland all day (probably not the best idea).
Instead, I got on K9 and discovered that you can set times the internet is off. Not just overnight, which I already had set, but actual hours during the day! So I have it set to turn off the internet for a couple hours a day, that way I'm not getting stuck online all day and wasting time. :) I'm spending too much of my day online.
I'm rather thrilled with this. Which is odd, when I think about it. I have less access to the internet. Woo!?
I also blocked a website I was wasting time on and that recently got more inappropriate. It had cool interesting posts, but lately I have to scroll through a lot of filth to get to the funny stuff.
A couple days ago I was glancing over Elder Holland's talk "Place No More For the Enemy of My Soul", and I realized that I was not following the suggestions Elder Holland makes in that talk.
One really stood out:
"Along with filters on computers and a lock on affections, remember that the only real control in life is self-control. Exercise more control over even the marginal moments that confront you. If a TV show is indecent, turn it off. If a movie is crude, walk out. If an improper relationship is developing, sever it. Many of these influences, at least initially, may not technically be evil, but they can blunt our judgment, dull our spirituality, and lead to something that could be evil."

That website, and some of the others I'm visiting are not "technically evil," but they are marginal. They can dull and blunt my spirituality and judgment and lead to not good things. So I blocked it.
The real temptation will be at work, where I don't have a filter on the internet there. And my job involves a lot of free time.
So I'm going to work on reading books, writing in my journal, cleaning, etc. 

After I worked on K9, I got up and cleaned the bathroom and my bedroom. It felt good to work.
It felt really good to climb into a nice, clean bed.

Today, I feel good. I'm off to bed.
Let the 24 hours begin now...


6 comments:

  1. You are such an amazing lady and a huge inspiration to me - thank you xx

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  2. there's so much awesomeness going on this post! You are so inspiring. And although it scares me to get to step 10 just to do this challenge, it is inspiring to watch you do this! You are awesome and I wanna hear how your 24 hours went/goes!

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    1. Thanks! I remember reading Step 10 and thinking I was never going to get there! Ha ha ha.

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  3. Like.

    Clean houses are magnificent.

    ;)
    Wish I knew you in the real world

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    1. I wish I knew you too, Seattle! You are more than welcome to come visit. ;)

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