The past couple months have been crazy! Not "I ended up in the hospital" crazy, but crazy. God decided to answer my long standing prayers to find a new place to live in one weekend. With 15 days to move! And it was hard.
I had to say goodbye to a place I've lived for two years! A ward I loved and people I considered friends.... and then things didn't end well with my landlady. Which also hurt.
I thought moving would fix everything and I found myself feeling depressed and anxious and still being late for work. My body was trying to deal with the sudden change, and the difficulty of that last day and I was starting therapy...
This week has been hard emotionally. I felt that I needed help, only to be asked to wait for a leadership meeting to be over. There are a lot of stresses and I've had some horrible user dreams.
But I did realize that the ARP program is not just about addiction.
I've started a new ARP manual and as I was reading Step 1, I realized that I could replace addiction with anxiety or depression and it was still true. I was being prideful, I was not being honest with myself and I was struggling.
I need to write and get a lot of this out, because keeping it inside is making my emotional state wobble and crash.
I do love that I have another resource for recovery from my mental hurts, the manual. So my goal today is to answer one question from the Study & Understanding section in Step 1.
Wish me luck.
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